Thursday, February 03, 2005

The Ground Rules (part ii)

3) Ask For What You Want: The bottomline is that the other person is not a mindreader. I've realized this over and over again. Though I'm always hesitant to "ask" for anything, I know that I need to. The good Doc says that in order to make you happy your partner needs to "understand what makes you tick." If you don't ask, you don't get. I've realized that asking doesn't equal to being selfish but rather asking the other person to help you fulfill the parts of your life missing. So ask away...

4) Learn Your Partner's Needs, and Strive to Fulfill Them: We all have needs and when our needs are not met, then we become dissatisfied. Speaking from a man's perspective, Dr. Phil says that men are especially afraid to rely on other people because it makes them emotionally tied and anytime something has to do with emotions, they (men) take it as a sign of weakness. Men, your women love you and would never take your emotional side as a sign of weakness. Let us in!

5) Invest in the Friendship: This is the absolute truth! When I first met my fiance, I wanted us to be friends and he obliged. That friendship turned to a deep caring love and the foundation for our relationship. We are best friends and we always remember this no matter what. Sometimes I see couples treating each other badly and I wonder if they treat their friends the same way. They take it for granted that the other person will understand. We all have to take a step back and remember that we should treat our partner the same way we treat other people. Friendship rocks!